I Had a Career Path in 6th Grade-What Happened to It?

In 6th grade I helped a girl realize she needed to talk to a counselor.  She would not go unless I went with her, from the moment I saw the interaction between her and the counselor, that was my life.  I wanted to be a Junior High Counselor and help people like my friend.

What the heck happened then?  I am obviously not a Junior High Counselor.  

Well, what had happened was, I made excuses, I gave up, I justified it all and settled for a life less extraordinary.  I had support but no one pushing me.  I had limited means and ways.  I decided I didn't like children.  I started making good money, more than teachers make for sure.  Blah, blah, blah.

The fact is, I chickened out.  I attended maybe a year and some months of TJC doing my basics and decided after a trip to the zoo during end of year field trips that I would change my majors to computers.  Then I got married and got cut off from free college money so I got a full-time job.  Then another one and another one.  Still didn't really like children or their parents.  Lost sight of the dream so to speak.  

One day I realized  I still wanted to help other people, how to do it was the question.  I had recently had a very successful weight-loss journey and that helped my mental wellness and my spirits and I wanted to spread the word, so I attended IIN for holistic health and wellness coaching.  Loved every minute of learning more about primary and secondary foods and listening to the experts and practical people who had put it into practice successfully.  I got high on practicing with other students on health histories and sharing with my friends.  I felt like donkey kong on crack after I left a client session.  I became a Happiness Coach, helping others find their happiness in whatever form that might take.  I give more of that away than I charge for really, it is just in my servants heart to help others.  

There have been several times over the last 36 years that the counselor bug has bit me again and again.  I would take a career aptitude test and test out to be a counselor, teacher, coach, etc..  I would see a need I wanted to fill.  I would be speaking to friends, kids, parents and wonder, what if I had of stayed the course.  

It has bitten again and I am wondering what to do with it all.

I felt led to post about women over 40 supporting and lifting one another up from a post a friend did that receive such love and support to and from the post and pondered why we could not have done that in school.  What can we do to teach these young girls to love each other and support one another instead of tearing one down and competing and just being mean because they can?  What can we change so that it does not take these girls 30 plus years to figure out we are all in it together?  As I am reading the post again and the responses the bug bites me hard.  Junior High Counselor would surely be equipped with the tools needed and a pretty captive audience.  Then I am back in Junior High and High School were I was bullied and then became the bully.  Why?  How do you stop it?  What can I do to make the world a little better place each and every day?

Here I sit, 48 and counting, what next?

Is the path still there?

Is my inner 6th-grader still doing cartwheels in the hall when she figured it out?

Points to Ponder for Sure!  

Mothers and Tools

Thinking about Mother's Day this coming weekend and pondering on life and such, I recall a recent conversation with a lady who has 2 grown children and 2 nearly grown grandchildren.  She said, "I did the best I could with the tools I had at the time".  Isn't that all any of us can ever do?  The best we know how?  We don't know what we don't know.
Here's the deal, there are no blueprints, manuals, youtube videos on how to raise a decent human.  Each parent does it differently than the next but a lot like their parents did it and their parents and so on.  If you were raised in an abusive home, you learn that is normal and most of the time, not all, continue that environment in your own home as your parent's did their's.  If you were raised Southern Baptist, I bet your grandparents were too.  If your mother chose cloth diapers, you may have used them on your child as well.  If your father drank to excess in front of you, you did not see any reason  not to do the same in front of your children or grandchildren.  Some do break the cycle, some create new ones.  Each parent goes on what they know, what they can learn from others in their tribe and surroundings.  They are using the tools they have to do the best they can.
FORGIVE THEM.  See that they really did do the best they could with the tools they had.  Forgive them, they did not intentionally set out to have a child and screw it up royally.  Forgive them, they did not want to see you falter or fail.  Forgive them and quit blaming them for your lot in life.
FORGIVE YOURSELF.  You are doing the best you can with the tools you have.  If you aren't, then start.  Forgive yourself for blaming them for your problems.  Forgive yourself for not loving them the way you think you should but don't.  Forgive yourself and do better by yourself and your family.
Acquire new tools for your toolbox.  Make room in the toolbox by getting rid of the tools that do not work for you and your family.  Do this for yourself and don't expect your mom and pop to change.  You do you.
Don't let another Mother's Day, Father's Day, Grandparent's Day or any other day pass you by without forgiveness, kindness and love.  We are all doing the best with can with the tools we have at the time.
Peace, Love and Mothers <3 p="">