Why 2016 Didn't Suck

Why 2016 didn't Suck
I made new friends, gained more clients, helped loads of friends, raised money and awareness for non-profits near and dear to my heart, attended more training, helped make 2 very large events a success through team-work and coordination, found a new skill as a Live Trivia DJ and had a blast, reconnected with classmates at the Big 80's Bash, river trip with good friends, family reunions, volunteered, made connections, served our Ragan's Hope families, re-connected with my father and his wife, her family, my brothers and their families, JenTemBer, accepted offer and sold my lake house, road trip with friends, 20 years at Adams Cherokee Storage, got my finances in order, gained and lost 30 pounds, hosted my first oil class, spent Thanksgiving with The Smith's for the first time in forever, sat down to eat a meal with my brothers for the first time in over 35 years, spent Christmas eve with them and their family, spent Christmas day with the Chance family and of course from day 1 we had TammyToo.
There were so many things to be grateful for this year and many blessings bestowed upon me and mine.  Was every day great, no, but there was something great in every day. I will continue to be thankful for those moments and not sad for those days.
Jen Cook
Happiness Coach

Not a Bad Human

Reoccurring thought 2 days in a row-when threatened, wounded or scared an animal will act out, lash out, attack and protect and we accept this as normal.
When a human is acting out, lashing and attacking you why do we assume this person is just a bad human?
What if they are in a bad situation they don't know how to leave or having a crisis and you are the soft target, what if something is hurting that is not visible to you or they are attempting to protect themselves from being hurt based on their past experiences?
When someone acts out or attacks you, it is not about you.  Period.
You can attack back, walk away or try to assist them.  If you saw a wounded animal what would you do?
You can not save people from themselves, but you can be the kindness in their otherwise unkind environment.
Be the change you want to see in the world.
Not a bad human, just having a bad day.  Treat them with kindness.  It could be you.

I watched a gentleman pursue a young lady by buying everyone at her table their meals and drinks. He had never met her or anyone else at the table. He paid the ticket for 4 adults and 2 kids he didn't know, all to win her heart.

As I left I told him thank you for the generosity and that it was very nice to meet him. He replied it did him no good she was not interested. I just smiled and left.

This is what I wanted to say to him and all of you who need to hear it, IF MONEY IS THE WAY TO HER HEART, YOU DO NOT WANT HER HEART.

I also wondered what made him think he had to buy his way in. Did he have so little worth of himself or was that something he had been taught. I did not exchange many words with him so I will never really know.

Here is what I want you to know as well, YOU ARE WORTH MORE THAN YOUR CREDIT LINE AND WHAT YOU DO FOR A LIVING.

Thank goodness she did not have the mentality that she OWED him something for his generosity. She had let him know that she did not want him to buy her anything, he did anyway. She told him no politely and with grace. He took it with grace as well.

A GOOD PERSON WILL NOT CARE WHAT IS IN YOUR WALLET BUT WHAT IS IN YOUR HEART AND SOUL.

That's who's heart you want.

Decisions and Empowerment

As a Happiness Coach, I listen while people speak of their lot in life, their situations, their current environment of living. I listen to not only what they are saying, but also what they are telling me by their pauses, body language, facial expressions, sarcasm and tone. There is so much to be heard. People have a NEED to be heard. More rare than touch, being heard can heal so much internal and external chaos. What I have heard the most recently is people do not feel they are empowered. They do not realize they have the power to make decisions about their life. They do not realize they are making decisions by not making a decision. They let life happen to them and then wonder what happened to their life. They quit speaking because no one was listening. They gave up trying because no one was pleased. They quit deciding because it was too much effort. They gave up their power, their self, their ideas, their voice, their life. There is only so much sacrificing you can do and still remain true to yourself.

In their struggle to find their happiness, they have to find themselves. They have to find their empowerment.

In finding their voice, their decision making, their inner strength, they will find their empowerment, their happiness.

You have to take control of your life before you can help others around you.

YOU HAVE TO MAKE DECISIONS FOR YOURSELF THAT WILL MAKE YOU HAPPY.

Jen Cook Happiness Coach

www.jencookhappinesscoach.com

www.facebook.com/JenCookHappinessCoach

@JenCookisHappy

Why do we inflame each other? Why do we continually post and poke at each other? Don't you know, inflammation is the silent killer. It is caused by stress, poor diet and many other life circumstances we CAN control. It leads to so many other diseases; auto-immune deficiency, lupus, ms, cancer, parkinsons, and so many more, too many to name here.

So why do we keep inflaming each other? Why do we keep posting things for the sake of arguing or a rant or to harm another? Why do we poke at each other, consistently putting each other down and kicking the one's already down?

Just think how healthy we would be if we just stopped doing that one thing. If we stopped posting those false beliefs as truths, if we stopped poking hatred into others and if we stopped putting each other down.

Post the positive, post the truth if it is helpful and you know it to be the truth, poke a hole in your beliefs and see if they hold water, poke a finger at yourself and take responsibility for your actions and last but not least, lift people up, give them a hand up, let them stand on your shoulders to see a better world for themselves, lift yourself up to higher standards.

Let's kill inflammation and save our lives and those we love.

Things I am finding people do not know and they should Part 17:
People, please, please PULEEEEAASE educate your children on Finances. They are not learning this stuff in school, correctly. You may not be great at your own finances but still try to teach the basics, maybe you will learn as you teach. 
Start teaching them to save and to negotiate and to shop for the best deal before purchasing. Let them understand what it takes to run a household, own a vehicle, go on vacations.
Let them get part-time jobs as soon as they are old enough. Let them sell their gently used toys or clothing or at least give them to charity. Part of teaching finances is teaching charity.
Don't protect them from the cruel, hard-knocks of life, give them the tools to handle them. Give them the tools to make their own decisions and then give them the support to follow through and face the consequences.
Chores are the first careers these kids have, on the job training for living a quality life as a functioning human being.
Start a savings savings account for them as soon as you know they exist, keep putting a dollar a day into that account until they are 18 years old. Allow them to start their own or add to the one you started as soon as they have their own money. Once they turn 18 encourage them to continue contributing to the account but let them know you are done and it is all on them. Hopefully by then they will choose to leave it and continue to contribute.
Please do not protect or pamper or spoil or hinder your child by doing everything for them, making every decision for them, cleaning up after them, etc.
Every human being that is capable should know the BASICS of life. Dress yourself, feed yourself, clean your self and your surroundings, earn your way, pay your way, pay your taxes, add and subtract, be charitable, be kind, be generous and stay hydrated.

Scarves are Hugs

I have recently become a fan of scarves, I think it started when I was given a scarf as a souvenir from a relative's trip over seas.  I have received scarves for Christmas and just because and have even purchased quite a few of my own.
The scarf that prompted this blog post is one that was hand made just for me by my best friend's mother.  My best friend had been in a store with me one day and I saw this scarf I just had to have until I saw the inflated price on the tag.  I walked away.  She had her mother make me one very similar to the one I saw in the store.  It wasn't a birthday present or a Christmas present, it was a just because present.  Because she was thinking of me and because she gets me.
Each time I put the scarf on I feel as if I am being hugged by her and her mother, I am being surrounded by their kindness and love.  I mean, it is HAND MADE!  Who does that any more?
Each scarf that I have been given is like a warm hug from the person who gave it to me.  I think of them as I wear it and send them good vibes as well.
Scarves I have purchased for myself are like me giving myself a hug.
They dress up the ordinary, they add a splash of color to your life and they keep you warm, just like those you wrap around your life.  Family and friends alike that add pizzazz, color and warmth to you.
Scarves are hugs, I hope you are extraordinary, colorful and warm.

Can You Be Great Without Adversity?

We see memes, posts, blogs, news stories, testimonies and biographies that tell us to become great we have to suffer adversity or adversities.  Is this true for everyone?
Must you find your dark pit of despair to rise like a phoenix?  Must you lose someone to hold life near and dear to you?  Must you trip and fall to learn how to walk?  Must you become bankrupt to know your own worth?  Must you have your heart broken to love unconditionally?  Must you knock on the gates of hell to realize you are an angel here on earth?  Must you lose your health to realize you are capable of strength?  Must you lose your mental capabilities to realize you are an intelligent being?
What if we could realize all of the above without ever knowing true hardship?  What if we could rise to our own greatness on our own terms and in our own time?  What if we were told that we are capable of this and so much more multiple times a day from the very beginning of our existence? What if we saw more memes, posts, blogs, news stories, testimonies and biographies that told of the human race rising from greatness to even more greatness?  What if right now, you chose to rise from the place you are at this moment into greatness?
What if there were no adversities?  Would there be no greatness?

I believe you are born to be great.  I believe that you have what it takes pre-programmed into you from conception.  I believe in you and your greatness.

You do not have to suffer to become great.
You do have to want to be great to become great.
Rise to your greatness now.

I had a thought this morning.
Every time you tell yourself or someone else your are NOT going to do something or be something, the Universe does not hear the NOT.
So instead try to change your language into the positive affirmation.
I am going to, I will be, I have.
This puts the positive out there.
It helps you already feel like you have what ever it is you want, it helps you feel like you are already there.
Next time you tell yourself you are not going to be late, change that story to I am there fixing my coffee and setting in with time to spare to take a deep breath and enjoy my environment.
Next time you tell someone you are too broke to do so & so, change that story to I have the means to do so & so I just prefer to do this with it instead. (because most of the time if we really wanted to go bad enough we would find a way, but the more you tell the story of being broke, the more the story stays true)
Next time you start self-loathing, try self-love. You are beautiful in whatever state you are in physically, mentally and emotionally. The mirror only reflects what you want to see, so see the best of you reflecting back. If your clothes don't fit, size-up until you can size down (if that is what you want to do) that way you feel more confident in your appearance while you get back to your goal. The more you run around in ill-fitting clothes the less confidence you have and the less will-power you will have to get back to where you want to be. You are beautiful no matter what your size.
Next time you you tell yourself you are stupid, please come see me and let me give you a head-slap and then a hug. You have made it this far and every day is a learning opportunity, if you are open to it.
You are in abundance, safe, beautiful, intelligent, timely, at peace and strong. Most importantly you are LOVED and love yourself.
Tell yourself and the world the story of you!
You are the author of your life. WRITE IT!